The Lord Gives Me Peace – Sister Zhou Xiao Jun

Before trusting in Jesus, I did not believe in Buddha, Guanyin, or visit temples. My mother became a Christian shortly after my father passed away. While I felt that it was good for her to have found a spiritual support and was happy for her, I continued to focus on my own life, studying and working in another city, and prioritising work and earning money to prevent my mother from worrying.

Eighteen years ago, I moved to Singapore and was constantly busy with work while I juggled family, children, and job pressures. This busy life didn’t make me feel fulfilled or secure. I felt like a machine who is constantly on the move. I believed that that only hard work could bring me hope in a foreign land.

My life continued this way until my son sat for his primary school leaving examination (PSLE). I experienced unprecedented anxiety. I even suspected I had depression. I was extremely nervous about my son’s examination results and often blamed myself for not spending enough time with him or properly guiding his studies. Even after he successfully entered secondary school, I couldn’t shake off the anxiety.

Many relatives and friends who were believers often prayed for me. I was, however, only grateful and never thought of attending church. I felt I didn’t have the time. Even when I was occasionally invited, I attended church activities out of courtesy. Although we had several Bibles at home, I never seriously read them, but found them dull and uninteresting.

When it was my daughter’s turn to sit for PSLE, the anxiety returned strongly. One day, my sister-in-law, Hui Lin, asked if I would like my daughter to be taught by a math teacher from their church. When I asked about the cost, she said it was free as long as I attended church. I was skeptical, but I confirmed it and decided to try it out. I then brought my daughter to Tree of Life Christian Church.

Initially, my daughter studied with Teacher Bryan. Gradually, she came to enjoy going to church every Sunday, and was able to make many good friends. Everyone at church was so warm and welcoming. It made us feel like part of a family. I enjoyed the Bible study sessions, where previously dull scriptures became understandable through the guidance of Elder Kerh Li and the sharing and insights from the members of the Love cell group. Pastor Andrew’s sermons were particularly enriching, and they drew me closer to God step by step.

During one of my Basic Bible classes, I discussed with Pastor how to become a “qualified” Christian. He told me that believing in Jesus was enough. I confessed my sins, accepted Jesus as my Saviour, and prayed with Pastor.

Now, despite a busy job and the many responsibilities of raising children, my faith in Jesus has strengthened over the past year. I am no longer trapped in anxiety or constantly complaining about exhaustion. Pastor Andrew taught me how to pray and encouraged me to trust in Jesus, who brings us peace and takes care of everything for us. Now, I often share church teachings and scriptures with my mother back home. This brought her strength and comfort amidst having to live apart from her children. She is now happier and healthier for which I thank the Lord. Trusting in God has lightened my burden and has provided solutions to many troubles that previously tormented me. With God in my heart, even though pressures in work and life continue to rise, I am now filled with strength and hope. I am grateful for His grace and protection.

translated by Rachel Goh